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    July 02

    病态

     
     
    3点半左右准备休息,我舍不得睡得太早.
    安静的夜里,思绪清晰,用来思考再合适不过.
     
    安静的躺在床上,琢磨刚才的对话.
    想到明天要查阅的资料要背下来的专业句子,立刻想要闭眼睡下去.
     
    四点左右胃部阵阵钻痛袭来,想要直立起来,行走至客厅,无力.
    慌乱中将手机打翻,忍痛捡起,拨,120...
     
    约十分钟左右,砸门,爬过去开,倒下.
    同仁医院,84消毒液的味道刺鼻,胃痉挛,止痛针.
     
    浑身大汗,情绪有所平定,医生建议留院观察,倔强的坚持回家.
    大夫妥协,120一路护航,约7点,平安抵家.
     
    付现金60元.
    感谢120方便快捷.
     
     
    我觉得胆汁都在我嘴里,其实什么也没有,吐不出来.
    在餐桌上找到几颗阿尔卑斯,剥开一个,放嘴里,上床,继续趴着.
     
    一个人生活可以自理,证明她长大独立了.
    一个人如果连感情都可以自给自足,证明她对现在的生活一点都不满意.
     
    讲了这么多,做作的话.
    只是为自己找借口.
     
    我觉得很多关于混乱的片段是类似的,比如我心里的万千感情跟我小心翼翼的胃痉挛.
    所谓异曲同工,妙不可言.
     
    我以为胃痉挛,不单单是因为胃部抗议.
    我的胃,是想排遣一下说不出的寂寞吧,想让乏味的生活略显生动一些.
     
     
    我总是舍不得自己,我总是对自己冷漠.
    矛盾.
     
    这一周瘦了至少四斤,偶尔穿得很少在房间里走来走去.
    想着书本上该死的单词跟朋友们说过的一些话,单薄的胃就开始莫名的痉挛起来.
     
    怎么了这是?
    没有更好的办法,除了安静不说话,还能怎样呢?
     
    化妆水用完了,保湿乳液也用完了.
    现在化妆品都能为我的心灵疗伤了.
     
    你说我有多病态.
    啧啧困惑
     
     
     
     
     
    9:00:56 AM | Blog it | 阴

    Comments (12)

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    amy liuwrote:
    我的电话留言给你msn了，上线即看到
    旧的不去，新的不来嘛
    July 6
    Julian J Yanwrote:
    不要总是以置身事外的角度看自己，试着对自己好一点，还有，别再瘦下去了哦～
    July 5
    小丢 .wrote:
    立雪


    加油吧,你会越来越美好,我会看着你,祝福你.
    July 5
    小丢 .wrote:
    amy


    姐姐下周有空我找你去,我手机丢了,你留电话给我...
    July 5
    小丢 .wrote:
    apple


    我是你的榜样!!!
    July 5
    小丢 .wrote:
    小四,你,死在新加坡了对吧?
    July 5
    小丢 .wrote:
    刘大策


    我,抽,死,你.

    我手机丢了,发email告诉我你电话.
    July 5
    大策 刘wrote:
    你还知道更新这里啊。。胃病又犯了？得养的 笨蛋
    July 5
    Samuel liwrote:
    take care ms
    July 3
    Apple Liuwrote:
    你得持续低调
    July 2
    amy liuwrote:
    亲爱的丢，
    一个人生活是需要坚强和自立的，要好好保重自己，爱护自己的身体
    希望那个能照顾你一辈子的人早点出现，那样小丢才会快乐健康的生活：p
    July 2
    立雪 张wrote:
    照顾好自己~~~必须的！
    July 2

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